I started following Nicole on Instagram and instantly found her posts so clear and concise but gentle at the same time. I really couldn’t wait for her book and it is amazing, the way Nicole writes allows for safe processing of past trauma. This book is truly a gift to the world!

This is a great successor of books such as How the Body Keeps the Score and Adult Children of Emotionally Immature parents. It helps reframe trauma to help you understand your behaviours and provides a method of change.

I saw myself in many of the anecdotes the author tells about her own life; how it was important to siphon off toxic energy from overbearing family members and/or take breaks from them for self care. I did feel a bit uncomfortable with the "self-affirming" activities and read them but skipped this step in my actual life. I was far more interested in the story she had to tell and how we could think about those applications in our own life - for example, feeling rejected, feeling un-heard, feeling traumatised, abandoned, not considered, etc. Her ability to recall and articulate those stories was brilliant and it's definitely a book I'll be reading again. The glossary and reference guide at the back of the book was exceptionally helpful. I'm about to study BSc Social Psychology and I kicked-off my pre-study journey with this book. I deducted a star for the self-affirming activities as they were not to my taste.